A Letter to My Tire Theif

Dear Spare Tire Theif,

Thank you so much for stealing my spare tire off my Jeep Liberty. That really helps the little thing hold its value even better during these economic times. How did you know that I wanted to spend $300 replacing a tire? And wake up to that fabulous new this morning? I am grateful for the opportunity to file a police report in a city where the crime rate ensures that this will never be looked into. I know it looked really easy to steal, I mean who leaves their spare tire on the back in plain sight. But really, thanks for pointing out that major design flaw. I also appreciate that now I have to put wheel locks on both cars to ensure that this won't happen again. Because wheel locks are really cheap in Houston. How exactly did you know that the price of the tire falls beneath what insurance will cover so it comes right out of my savings account? Now instead of buying a crib and a glider which we so badly need for our bundle of joy, we get to replace that tire. That also makes it really convenient while I am trying to save for a 3 grand hospital bill. Appreciate it, I really do. Oh, by the way, should you choose to come back you will be greeted with wheel locks on several vehicles, I think we were an inspiration for our neighbors. Happy hunting for the other 3 spare tires that will make a set, because I would HATE to think that I was robbed for a measly $50 which is likely all you will get from selling one poorly rated tire. Because seriously, not that many people just need one. I thoroughly enjoyed being robbed by you. Have a nice day.

P.S. I hope the sky falls on your head, just a thought. Oh, and Karma is not a pleasant thing if you catch my drift.

Heather- the pregnant lady that you stole from